Since Roman Emperor Constantine became a Christian and helped transform it into the Imperial religion, its teachings have influenced the value system of the Western world. Through this, Christianity has led public morals and even the legal system, persisting into the present day.
Despite the rising number of Americans identifying as atheist, agnostic, or “nothing in particular”, Christianity still plays a vital role in society. In the United States, many of the early colonists were Puritans. This conservative sect of the Anglican Church outlined a strict code of morality, banning many festivities, like Christmas, and disapproving of any sexual relations outside of a monogamous, heterosexual marriage. While Christmas was eventually reintroduced, Puritan beliefs surrounding sexuality remain evident in the modern context, where sex is often seen as more of a taboo than violence in television and cinema.
Rev. Dr. Raymond J. Lawrence, a Pastoral Psychotherapist, Episcopal Cleric, author, chaplain, and co-founder of the College of Pastoral Supervision and Psychotherapy (CPSP) states that mainstream Christianity is the only major religion around the world, that believes marriage to be solely between one man and one woman. This “obsession” he says, is pathological and has stifled freedoms and individual growth for centuries.
As stated by Lawrence, Christianity emphasizes sexual purity to such an extent that Jesus Himself was believed to be celibate throughout his life. Any implication that Jesus had a wife, – commonly identified as Mary Magdalene – was quickly denounced and labeled heretical by Church authorities.
When evaluating how Christianity adopted this firm stance on monogamy, Lawrence suggests it can be traced back to Constantine and Rome. Christian Roman culture was both monogamous and patriarchal, while Judaism reflected a more open acceptance of non-monogamous arrangements. This is evident within the Old Testament, where men married multiple women or had concubines.
“With Ancient Rome being patriarchal, there was a need to ensure that a man’s children were actually his,” Lawrence says. “There was no DNA testing at the time, so monogamy evolved as a social institution, feeding male narcissism and reinforcing a man’s ownership of his wife and their children. However, monogamy is still no guarantee, as DNA tests are revealing a growing number of instances of paternity fraud.”
Authored by Lawrence in 1989, The Poisoning of Eros: Sexual Values In Conflict depicts the changing positions of Christianity on the topic of sexuality. In this book, he discusses the ways the religion abandoned its once positive attitude towards sexual pleasure – as seen within Judaism – and adopted the Roman Imperial assessment. Lawrence also mentions Martin Luther, a significant historical figure who made hints about leading a non-monogamous life. Luther was married to one of the 12 nuns who he helped escape from the convent (named Katharina von Bora) and was known for her involvement in starting a sexual revolution in Western Christianity. This is also considered the reason why Protestant ministers are permitted to marry while Catholic priests are not. However, Raymond Lawrence shares his lament regarding the Lutheran reversion to a negative attitude towards sex. In the same year as its release,
The Poisoning of Eros won the World Congress on Sexuality Book Award in Caracas, Venezuela.
Lawrence published a second book on the subject in 2007, titled Sexual Liberation: The Scandal of Christendom, detailing the way sex throughout the ages has been regarded as a topic of perversion, sin, and wrongdoing. He shares commentary on how the motivations of a few have persisted into the modern age and what that looks like in today’s world. He states that Anton Boison was one of the many victims of this negative view around sex. Recognized as one of the founders of clinical pastoral care, Boison was punished heavily as a child for his natural exploration of sexuality. This had a lifelong impact on him, becoming a likely reason for his lifelong vow of celibacy.
“That terrible childhood experience damaged Boisen, but it also gave rise to the clinical pastoral training movement, which he developed out of his own psychoses,” says Lawrence. “Boisen turned it around to focus on other people and hearing their shame and their ‘sins’, sacrificing his own pleasure while being therapeutic for others. Many Americans have a similar experience. We can draw parallels between the shame that his mother inflicted on him and how mainstream Christianity makes people feel about their sexuality. Not everyone is suited to a heterosexual and monogamous lifestyle, yet they are pressured to conform. I believe the world is so full of new and wonderful things that consenting adults should not be bound strictly to monogamy.”
