A single retired grandfather in the South has made the tough decision to leave his estate to charity instead of his immediate family. The man, who has worked his entire life spanning a couple of full careers, feels let down by his 50-year-old daughter and adult grandsons. His daughter has tied herself to an alcoholic and seems to be spiraling downward with him.
His grandsons, scattered across the country, are described as lazy, with none holding full-time jobs. They used to spend summers with him during their mid-teens, but communication has since dwindled to one-word answers like “Fine,” “OK,” and “Yup.”
Moreover, his daughter has no retirement savings or company retirement plan. He suspects that his family’s ultimate plan is to rely on his home, property, and possessions as their own retirement strategy.
Fearing his hard-earned possessions might end up in the wrong hands, he has chosen to leave his estate to a charity he values.
Choosing charity over family estate
“I have visions of my possessions being destroyed by a couple of alcoholics or sold off for quick cash,” the grandfather said.
“I have decided my estate will all be donated to my favorite charity, a worthwhile cause where it will truly mean something to people who care.”
He now faces the dilemma of whether to inform his family of his decision now or let them find out after his funeral. “Should I let my daughter and grandkids know now, so they have an opportunity to change course and prepare, or let them be surprised after they don’t go to my funeral?” he asks. It’s advised to put the decision in writing and ensure a lawyer is fully aware.
The daughter should be informed, in the context of advance planning, about who will be the executor of the will, the funeral or memorial arrangements, and how assets will be disposed of. If there are concerns about the conversation turning unpleasant, an attorney can mediate. As for the question of letting them know now or later, informing the daughter ahead of time might provide her with the chance to change course, but the decision is ultimately up to the grandfather.
